Adultery

• Exodus 20:14

"Thou shalt not commit adultery."

• Matthew 5:27-28

"whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart."

• Matthew 5:31-32

"But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery."

• Matthew 16:4

"A wicked and adulterous generation seeketh after a sign; and there shall no sign be given unto it, but the sign of the prophet Jonas. And he left them, and departed."

• Matthew 12:39

"But he answered and said unto them, An evil and adulterous generation seeketh after a sign; and there shall no sign be given to it, but the sign of the prophet Jonas:"

• D&C 42:22-26

22) Thou shalt love thy wife with all thy heart, and shalt cleave unto her and none else.

23) And he that looketh upon a woman to lust after her shall deny the faith, and shall not have the Spirit; and if he repents not he shall be cast out.

24) Thou shalt not commit adultery; and he that committeth adultery, and repenteth not, shall be cast out.

25) But he that has committed adultery and repents with all his heart, and forsaketh it, and doeth it no more, thou shalt forgive;

26) But if he doeth it again, he shall not be forgiven, but shall be cast out.

• D&C 42:74-77,80-82

74) Behold, verily I say unto you, that whatever persons among you, having put away their companions for the cause of fornication, or in other words, if they shall testify before you in all lowliness of heart that this is the case, ye shall not cast them out from among you;

75) But if ye shall find that any persons have left their companions for the sake of adultery, and they themselves are the offenders, and their companions are living, they shall be cast out from among you.

76) And again, I say unto you, that ye shall be watchful and careful, with all inquiry, that ye receive none such among you if they are married;

77) And if they are not married, they shall repent of all their sins or ye shall not receive them.

...

80) And if any man or woman shall commit adultery, he or she shall be tried before two elders of the church, or more, and every word shall be established against him or her by two witnesses of the church, and not of the enemy; but if there are more than two witnesses it is better.

81) But he or she shall be condemned by the mouth of two witnesses; and the elders shall lay the case before the church, and the church shall lift up their hands against him or her, that they may be dealt with according to the law of God.

82) And if it can be, it is necessary that the bishop be present also.

• D&C 59:6

"Thou shalt not commit adultery ... nor do anything like unto it."

• D&C 63:16

"He that looketh on a woman to lust after her, or if any shall commit adultery in their hearts, they shall not have the spirit, but shall deny the faith and fear"

• D&C 92:22-23

Like D&C 63:16

• D&C 132:41-44

• D&C 132:61-63

• Deborah Netburn, "To minimize risk of infidelity, make sure you earn as much as your spouse", L.A. Times, 1 Jun 2015

• John M. Gottman, "The Science of Trust: Emotional Attunement for Couples", 2011, pp. 341-347

Gottman describes that the "Atom of Betrayal" in a relationship is an unfavorable CL-ALT (basically, imagining that another relationship would be better) paired with turning away from bids for attention.

Notes

Some of the material here relates to lust.

Committing Adultery in Your Heart

John Gottman's modelling of the "Atom of Betrayal" as imagining that another relationship would be better paired with turning away from bids for attention. Given that imagining that another relationship would be better should lead to increasing turning away from bids for attention, then it seems that the fundamental issue is "imagining that another relationship would be better".

This strongly reminds me of Christ's "whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her".

Gottman describes that betrayal is fed and magnified by conflict avoidance. He suggests that this is because betrayal incidents that one perpetrates that are ignored and dismissed fester and are not forgotten because they never get processed and lead to emotional flooding which then feeds greater betrayal.

Cross-References

• The 10 Commandments
• Chastity
• Divorce
• Fornication
• Marriage